Was sie labert

Pressure. Pushing down on me.  Really?  When I take a closer look at who or what is putting me under pressure, I realize that... it's actually me. There's no one else who demands such unrealistic things from me than me myself. Well, there are people who expect things from me, but the only person who decides a) whether or not to accept and fulfil these expectations, b) to what extent (of perfection) and c) to add extra tasks is ME.  Moreover, what characterizes the expectations I have on myself is that firstly, they are vague, so it's never clear when they are fulfilled, and secondly, they are completely unrealistic. Who would expect you to face ALL your fears in just ONE day? Maybe I'll even write a book and climb the Mont Blanc in the same day if I get to it.  The thing is: They feel like they come from the outside world, and they feel real. They're threatening and always imply some terrible outcome happening if I don't do X or fulfil condition Y. Nobody wants ...

Hello, it's me, the void.  I'm calling you again from the depths. It's been a while since we have spoken. Have you been so caught up in your day-to-day that you've forgotten about me? Knock knock. Whisper whisper. I'm still here, patiently waiting, and my business is still the same: To remind you that you're the one who has to make sense of it all. Does that sound challenging or even overwhelming? Nobody said that life was easy. You've made yourself quite comfortable in your comfort zone, haven't you? Time to look outside it. To push the boundaries that are getting closer and closer, leaving you minimal room to breathe. Or is that what you call life? Is that what you want? You can now ponder this question before your first coffee, on the train, or in your dreams. No, I don't have an answer either, and even if I did, I wouldn't tell you. Haha. That would be waaay to easy. Boring. Pointless. Neither will I promise that you'll find one. Unlike m...

At times, all I can think of is holiday, going away, breaking out of the routine and seeing something completely different (okay, actually the places I'm going to then look fairly similar to my home town: middle sized towns with pittoresque houses, surrounded by green middle high hills, often crossed by a river). So much I longed for time away from everything. After three days into the trip, however, what I longed for most was home. Not because the holiday was so terrible. I didn't get bedbugs or a sunstroke and I wasn't robbed (all of which have happened recently, to me or people around me). I just didn't have any drive for activities anymore.  Impressive, but not for a mind that is already full What I probably really needed was not an exciting trip with lots of new impressions and little adventures, but a bed somewhere by a lake and a week of rain. To simply do nothing. Not the kind of doing nothing where you're stuck behind a screen, paralysed and restless. But t...

 Kaffee-Craving 10/10 ich wünscht', hier würd' ne Tasse stehn Synapsen sind am Abdrehn oder eher Eingehn schwarzes Gold, ich sehn' nach dir komm bitte bitte bald zu mir ein Montag ohne dich ist Kampf mein Hirn nur noch Kartoffelstampf.   Sei gnädig, wenn ich's schon nicht bin Verleih dem Existieren Sinn hell dies' kurze Leben auf mach mich high, bring mich drauf lass mich bitte nicht allein mit dir, oh süßes Säftelein kann Leben ja so herrlich sein ich schwör', ich bin für immer dein.

 My daily mental chatter on some days consists mainly of questions. In these moments, I seldomly have anyone to ask them to, so I'm just throwing them out here, in no particular order. You may use them for self-reflection, to get to know someone better, to start a conversation, or you may just find them odd. Whatever you prefer. Either - or?  - 11 am or pm? - Shower or bath? - sleeping on the side or on your tummy? - coffee at a corny cafè or pub night? - lake, sea, or river? - Lark/early bird or night owl? - Listening to music on a speaker or through headphones? - Heat or cold? - Singing or dancing or both? - Saturday night: at home or in a bar/club? - Gift: flowers or chocolate? Questions to dig a little deeper: - What is your favorite day and why? - What are you looking forward to in the upcoming week(s)? - How did you imagine yourself to be now when you were 12 years old? - Do you have a recurring dream? If so, what is it about? - What's your favorite weather? - What's ...